So Funny
We don’t usually do this, but just had to post the most amusing Email Joke of the Day.
1. The US has made a new weapon that destroys people but keeps the building standing. It’s called the stock market.
2. Do you have any idea how cheap stocks are? Wall Street is now being called Wal-Mart Street .
3. The difference between a pigeon and an investment banker.. The pigeon can still make a deposit on a BMW.
4. What’s the difference between a guy who lost everything in Las Vegas and an investment banker? A tie!
5. The problem with investment bank balance sheet is that on the left side nothing’s right, and on the right side nothing’s left.
6. I want to warn people from Nigeria , if you get any e-mails from Washington asking for money… It’s a scam. Don’t fall for it.
7. What worries me most about the credit crunch is that, if one of my checks is returned stamped ‘insufficient funds,’ I won’t know whether that refers to mine or the bank’s.
New Stock Market Terms:
CEO –Chief Embezzlement Officer.
CFO– Corporate Fraud Officer.
BULL MARKET — A random market movement causing an investment banker to mistake himself for a financial genius.
BROKER — What my broker has made me.
FINANCIAL PLANNER — A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
MARKET CORRECTION — The day after you buy stocks.
PROFIT — An archaic word no longer in use. (I believe this also applies to the word RETIREMENT.)
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